Hey there, DETECTIVES! DETECTIVE WRITER here to tell you all about another work of art I shared with y’all a while back but wanted to bring back with a bit more sparkle for your reading pleasure. But this time, it’s not a short story but a play that’s not exactly murder mystery-themed but I promise you it’s filled with tons of drama, inner and outer conflicts, the discovery of finding oneself, and a few food references here and there. Here we are, DETECTIVES!
Serving Up Sides of Hell
By DETECTIVE WRITER
Act 1 Scene i
The front door opens, the keys are placed in the small glass
bowl, and the lights are turned on. TANYA immediately pulls out
a water bottle from her bag, sits down on the couch, propping
her legs up, and closes her eyes.
TANYA
(with a deep sigh)
Oh, my goodness. When can I stop working at that damn office?
I’m exhausted. When I finally make enough money, I will go to
culinary school and become a chef.
(takes a long sip of her water bottle and places it down on
the nightstand)
I mean it will take a few years, but I know my dreams will come
true. They must. That’s what the American Dream is all about,
just like PAPA always says. Oh well, I might as well read
today’s news.
(pulls out the newspaper from her bag, skims through it
before gasping in shock)
Huh? What’s this? A cooking internship in New Orleans and one
chef will be chosen with the best dish! Ay Dios Mio! It’s like
my prayers have been answered. I have faith I will win this
competition. The judges will like me. I know they will. I just
have to give it my all.
Act I Scene ii
The door opens. MEGAN is walking through the front door of her
grey mansion. She sets her Prada purse down on the counter and
sinks down to her blue recliner. As she pulls out the newspaper
from under the seat that she left behind in the morning, she
begins to look through the paper. She then catches a glimpse of
a topic that catches her eye.
MEGAN
Huh? What’s this? A chef’s internship in New Orleans? Sounds
like my kind of game.
(leans back in her recliner)
All I need to do is find the stupid application and I will be on
my way to New Orleans in no time.
(stands up from the recliner to grab a cup of orange juice)
I think I’ve got this whole internship in the bag.
(Landline rings and MEGAN goes to retrieve it)
MEGAN
Hello? Oh, hi DADDY. No, everything is fine. How’s mom? Nothing
much. Just looking at an application for an internship for
chefs. Yeah, it’s in New Orleans. No worries DADDY. I will win.
I know it. Aww, love you too good night.
(takes a sip of her juice)
I know that I’ve got this internship in the bag. I know it.
(silence)
Act I Scene iii
MEGAN is walking away from the Cordon Bleu school in Pasadena,
California when suddenly she is knocked down to the ground.
TANYA
Oh, my goodness! I’m so sorry Miss! I swear I didn’t see you.
(raising a hand to help MEGAN up)
MEGAN
(lifting an eyebrow and giving a hand to TANYA)
Uhh, sure it’s fine.
(wipes dirt off of her dress as she stands up)
TANYA
Please. Let me make it up to you. I noticed you were also inside
the Cordon Bleu for the internship in New Orleans. I know we
just ate, but could I buy some coffee and doughnuts?
MEGAN
I don’t eat doughnuts. They are too fattening. I also don’t
trust strangers.
TANYA
Well, then just coffee and a scone then. Please, Miss, allow me
to make it up for accidentally pushing you down.
MEGAN
Not “Miss.” My name is MEGAN and really, it’s fine.
TANYA
Please. I insist. My name is TANYA by the way.
MEGAN
(with a deep sigh)
Sure. Why not? Oh, and I should also mention I only drink my
coffee with almond milk.
TANYA
(giving a soft smile)
Almond milk it is. Shall we go to the nearest bakery MEG?
MEGAN
(surprised at the nickname)
Huh. My father calls me that.
(with a small smirk)
Well then, lead the way TANYA.
(The two women then head into a nearby cafe and end up
talking for several hours about their aspirations to become
famous chefs).
Act I Scene iv
Lights up in MEGAN’s apartment. MEGAN is sitting on the couch in
the living room as she skims through a magazine.
Her father KEVIN enters from the kitchen drinking a glass of
wine before sitting down on the couch next to MEGAN.
KEVIN
(sets wine glass down on the coffee table and snatches
MEGAN’s magazine out of her hands)
You aren’t demonstrating your true potential as a chef. You are
choosing to slack off on boys, sleeping, and crap like this!
(raises the magazine to MEGAN’s face and throws it to the
ground)
MEGAN
(with a look of surprise and fear)
I’m sorry DADDY! I don’t know what more you want from me. I’m a
chef and applying for an internship in New Orleans. I’m trying
here DADDY. I am!
(stands up from the couch and slams her foot down on the
ground)
KEVIN
(with a bewildered look)
Ha! You’ve been trying? You think you’ve been trying anything.
You’re just a failure.
(stands up and paces around the living room)
I mean honestly. Sometimes I wonder why me and your mother even
paid for culinary school if you were just going to end becoming
just some ordinary cook!
(looks at Megan up and down while rolling his eyes)
MEGAN
(with tears in her eyes and a broken voice)
I’m not an ordinary cook, DADDY!
(sniffles)
I- I – I am Megan, the famous chef from Cordon Bleu. I am
someone and you know that better than anyone because KEVIN
(guffaws)
You are nobody MEGAN! An absolute loser who’s been a good-for-nothing ever since she was born. I knew it and your mother knew
it! You could never make us proud.
MEGAN
Don’t say that DADDY. You should know I’ve worked really hard to
be a chef. I mean yes, I did it at first to get CHAD to like me
but over time I’ve proven myself, worth DADDY!
KEVIN
The only way you could ever prove your self-worth is if you
crush that other girl’s chances of ever getting into that
internship. What’s her name? Robin? Tasha?
MEGAN
Do you mean Tanya?
KEVIN
Yeah… Tanya. You need to destroy her chances of ever getting
into that internship young lady! If you want a chance to redeem
yourself in my eyes, you need to crush her!
MEGAN
(with widen eyes)
But how can I do that DADDY? I barely know her. I mean what am I
supposed to do just so she doesn’t get it?
KEVIN
(rapidly swinging his arms)
Uhh… I don’t know. Poison her food or something. I don’t know!
But you need to think of something if you ever want to call
yourself my daughter!
MEGAN
(with tears running down her eyes)
Please don’t disown me, DADDY! I promise I’ll do whatever you
say! Just don’t leave me alone.
KEVIN
(with squinted eyes)
Oh, don’t worry my darling girl. I won’t leave you alone unless
you do just what I say and come up with the creativity on
your part.
(laughs)
You’ve disappointed me enough times MEGAN. I’d hate to see that
happen another time sweetheart. Make me proud MEGAN.
(pinches MEGAN’s wet cheek).
MEGAN
(silence)
I promise you DADDY that I will make you proud of me. I will get
that internship one way or another.
Act I Scene v
Hurried footsteps rush into the Cordon Bleu kitchen. Panting
with shallow breaths, MEGAN runs inside as she quickly pulls out
a small Tabasco hot sauce bottle.
MEGAN
(places a hand on her chest as she tries to calm her fast
beating heartbeats)
Come on. You can do this because you promised DADDY. You already
did it once. No one caught you.
(repeats mantra)
You can do this. Just a little hot sauce. You can do this. Just
a little hot sauce You can do this.
(walks around the kitchen, searching for TANYA’S chicken
dish under her name)
Okay. Now just do it and get it over with. Goddamn.
(takes a deep breath as she opens the hot sauce bottle and
slowly pours tiny drops inside TANYA’S chicken dish)
There. That’s it and now no one will know. That way stupid TANYA
won’t stand in my way, she’s only trying to stand in my way just
like DADDY said.
(quietly walks out of the kitchen in silence when she
Suddenly jumps)
TANYA
(with wide eyes)
MEGAN! That’s my dish. What the hell are you doing to it?!
MEGAN
Uhh- see I– uhh. There’s a good explanation.
TANYA
(folds her arms)
I’m waiting.
MEGAN
(takes a deep breath)
Okay, well TANYA… I guess it’s time that you know the truth.
Act I Scene vi
Sickened and hurt by twenty-seven-year-old Megan’s cruel
sabotage of her dish during a “friendly” dual cook-off,
twenty-three-year-old Tanya confronts the betrayal. She attacks
Megan’s behavior from the moment they met, belittles her
distinct background to hers while confessing a secret.
TANYA
(with a raised voice and anger in her tone)
How dare you! How absolutely dare you! I thought you were my friend and I believed you when you kept saying we support one
another not bring each other down. You have only ever viewed me
as an enemy and didn’t even want to take the chance to get to
know me before you decided to judge me because I’m some poor immigrant from Columbia. What, you think that because you were
born in some rich ass family with servants and a sports car that
Mommy and daddy still pay for to this day that you are better than
me?
MEGAN
(with wide eyes)
It’s simple as that TANYA. I was always the better chef and you
needed to know that one way or another. I am better than you
TANYA and you should accept that.
TANYA
Ha! You have never had to struggle to fight for what you want.
Unlike you, I’ve never been able to just say I want something
and just had it given to me. Unlike you, I know how to look past
someone’s background and actually getting to know the person
beneath.
(Begins to walk around in a circle while moving her arms
around before resting them on her forehead)
MEGAN
I am not some bratty little girl you think I am. I know how to
be kind to others. You just weren’t my cup of tea that’s all.
TANYA
(jaw-dropping)
I just wasn’t your cup of tea? Are you freaking kidding me?
(yells)
I mean, god damn it, Megan! You just deliberately put hot sauce
in my chicken casserole recipe and nearly caused me to lose a
competition YOU so nicely asked to help me out with! You said
“it’s just a nice cook-off between friends. No pressure and just
think of it as a barbecue.” You lied to me. I should have
known it was you who set the timer longer when I was baking my
chocolate soufflé. It was you who added cumin to my meatballs
when you and I know very well that one of the judges was
allergic and he ended up getting sent to the hospital! And it
was you who tricked me into ever believing you were my friend
only to stab me in the back, but you never really were a friend
because you have never liked me ever right?
MEGAN
(with a light scoff)
You know, despite what you may think. I did like you in the
beginning. It was just until a little voice in my head told me
that you were the enemy and rivals don’t get the nice me, they
just get hell.
(chuckling)
TANYA
You have no idea how much I trusted you. I let you in my home
even though I was nervous to show you my apartment because it’s
small and what did you tell me? “Oh no worries, I love any
humble home. It’s much cozier than the mansion I grew up in. How
could you use me? You have absolutely no idea how much I have
grown to care for you. I mean really care for you that it became
really hard to imagine my life without you.
MEGAN
(with a sharp gasp and holding her hand to her chest)
Yo– you– you’re not saying…
TANYA
Yes MEGAN. You are hearing me right and you will hear me say it
now. I love you. I love you because I thought I finally had
someone who wouldn’t EVER deem me a simple stupid girl with a
dream to make a new life for herself.
MEGAN
(with a shocked expression and beginning to stutter)
Oh my… god. TANYA. I–I– I don’t know what to say.
TANYA
(tears now streaming down her face)
It doesn’t matter now. You have shown me that you are nothing
more than a spoiled little rich girl who doesn’t give a crap
about anyone else other than herself. I never want to see you
again because you are dead to me. Goodbye Ms. Hart.
(with squinted eyes giving a teary final glare at Megan,
walks away from her)
MEGAN
(stunned)
Oh, man. TANYA loves me. I- I can’t believe this. But I won’t
stop her. She is still my enemy set to destroy me just like
DADDY said. Just focus on that okay MEGAN? That’s all.
(closes her eyes and trying to steady her shaky breathing).
Act I Scene vi
Pacing back and forth in her living room as her father continues
to glare at her, MEGAN suddenly stops at her pace and looks at
her father who is standing a few feet away from her with tears
in her eyes.
MEGAN
I did everything you told me to do DADDY! What more can you
possibly want from me?
KEVIN
(folds his arms close to his chest as he raises an eyebrow)
Oh, you know very well what more I want you to do. Destroy that
slut’s chances of beating you for the internship one way or
another. What exactly do you not understand MEGAN?!
MEGAN
(crying and with a broken voice)
Like I told you DADDY I did everything. Everything you ever
asked me! Is it too much for you to just trust that I can beat
TANYA with my skills and talents as a chef?
KEVIN
(guffaws)
Huh! Skills and talents as a chef? What qualities could you
possibly possess for anything MEGAN? I swear you know how to
make me laugh sometimes.
MEGAN
(with a gasp and clutches her hand to her chest in shock)
You don’t have faith I can win this competition at all DADDY?
KEVIN
Just do as I ask and everything will be fine.
MEGAN
No.
KEVIN
Excuse me?
MEGAN
(wipes her tears away with her sleeve)
No. I won’t do anything else until you tell me just why you want
me to destroy her chances so bad.
KEVIN
Because you need to have a reputation
MEGAN
No. That’s not it. Tell me, DADDY!
KEVIN
(with a deep voice)
Leave it alone MEGAN.
MEGAN
Tell me why DADDY.
KEVIN
(with a harsher tone)
You don’t want to push my buttons MEGAN.
MEGAN
(growing frustrated with her father’s attitude and with a slam of her fist on the coffee table)
Goddamn it! Tell me the fucking truth already DADDY!
KEVIN
(taking rough breaths and tightening the grip on his shirt)
Because her mother doesn’t deserve to have a happy daughter!
MEGAN
(taken aback and takes a few steps towards her father)
What? What does TANYA’S mother have to do with this?
KEVIN
(with a deep breath and stares at MEGAN directly in the
face)
Her mother was my lover. Long before I met your mother, I went
on a senior trip to Columbia and I met and fell for a woman with
beautiful brown eyes and shiny hair. But she chose someone else.
MEGAN
(with a soft chuckle)
So… all of this has been about an old love affair? Really DADDY?
Must you have been so stupid?
KEVIN
(angered at her words and rapidly raises his hand to slap
MEGAN)
I am your father and that will be the last time you ever call me
stupid. I may not be the same as some shithead twenty-year-old
but I am still strong enough to knock out your teeth! The only
stupid one here is you! You, MEGAN are the only one to blame
because you still question me and doubt my words.
MEGAN
(holding on to her red cheek while slowly turning to her
father)
You… hit me. You hit me, DADDY.
KEVIN
You deserved it.
MEGAN
No, I didn’t. What I deserved was you being honest with me from
the beginning instead of critiquing me and judging me as you
have my whole life. I have never been enough for you and all you
can think about is some stupid revenge plot.
(scoffing softly)
And I was the stupid one to ever believe you knew what was best
for me. When TANYA has been nothing but kind to me. She trusted
me. How could I have been so-
KEVIN
Don’t you dare give up on our plan!
MEGAN
No DADDY. I’m giving up on you! You don’t deserve to have me as
a daughter. I’m worth more than that. I deserve a family.
(taking a deep breath to steady her breathing)
And with that…
(walks to her front door and opens it)
I’m afraid I must ask you to leave.
KEVIN
(with wide eyes and his jaw-dropping)
I am still your father. Remember that. You can’t get rid of me
so easily.
MEGAN
(still holding on to her door)
No. You are just someone I used to know. Please leave.
KEVIN
You need me MEG. Don’t forget that.
MEGAN
Forget about me and no worries I will make do what I have.
Goodbye… Kevin.
KEVIN
(with a surprised gasp)
So, it’s like that now?
MEGAN
This is how it will always be. Goodbye Kevin and now please
leave. You have overstayed your welcome.
KEVIN
(walks out the door)
MEGAN
(quickly slams the door behind him. She begins to rub her
arms back and forth before sliding down the back of the
door
and begins sobbing).
Oh my god TANYA. All I can ever hope is that you forgive me one
day.
(silence).
I hope you enjoyed this ending, DETECTIVES! Stay tuned for next week’s post. Until then, keep on sleuthing, DETECTIVES!
Detective Writer 